I want to give you a handjob with my mouth.
Her tattoo has the intellectual profundity of snakes on a plane except you can't laugh.
i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
I cried while dry heaving in the back of the car to the New York song with jay z in it. I was singing it inbetween gags.
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
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