Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
the pizza man had no reaction when jackie and me opened the door naked, i guess he's used to that shit
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
Its hard to hear the music in here over his nasal whistle. And his breath smells like old milk. I think I need more vodka, and he better be buying. You owe me.
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
omg i wish you could see the front of my car.
There's literally a dust print of your body and your arm trying to hold on and the other one where your fingers visibly dragged down the hood.
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
It's like the first time your mom catches you masturbating. We both know what she saw. We're just not talking about it...
Living alone for four weeks has given me unrealistic expectations of pantslessness.
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
Somewhere on my work laptop I have a map visualizing all the area codes that Ludacris has ho's
I hope that wasn't done on billed time
I can guarantee that it was
I told the cop I was late for a booty call. He still gave me a ticket but he wrote his number on it
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