Just saw a midget shotgun a coors light
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
Passing out during sex is actually quite pleasant. its like being rocked to sleep with a penis
You could say the cab driver was less than excited when we called his personal cell phone at 4am for directions back to our hotel after having blacked out at the club
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
I went in the hotel's jacuzzi fully clothed, threw up in the bathroom half an hour later and woke up naked next to Dr. Seuss' "Oh the Places You'll Go"
If sex isn’t mentioned at least three times at the dinner table, I’m not interested...
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