Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
Maury Povich's contact info is in our database at work...i should steal it right?
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
I spit up blood this morning
That's vegas.
It's like God was speaking to me through a penis.
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
Just your daily reminder that we're terrible people: the average number of men a woman sleeps with in their lifetime is 4
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
On my way to get pizza I followed a dog into Salvation Army where I was just hired
I'm pretty sure I imagined the dog... They still hired me
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