Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
His rebound girl is half his size, looks like a leprechaun, is majoring in theater studies and has arms like Rosie O'donnell. Do I win?
the thing I didn't realize I would miss about college is that at home you can't just dismiss your sex bruises as drunk accidents
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
She said I had a really great aura. Which I think is hippie code for "I bet you can give me a mind melting orgasm"
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
a guy offered me a piece of pizza if I'd make out with a random girl. We got the whole damn box and I ain't even mad
You got into an extremely loud argument with a juggalo and slapped him, he started crying and everyone cheered.
I remember that, it happened before I started drinking. I thought you said I did something shameful?
A guy I don't even know just ate me out on a washing machine at a random persons afterparty. I came as it was going through spin cycle.Just kept thinking "who does laundry during a party?"
Randomize
