So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
I'm still drunk from last night...I walked out for a cigarette with one of the Janitors here and apparently someone took a shit on the stairs...Which makes me wonder...was that me?
i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
just cut a line with my blood donor card...i feel like it will help remind me that i was once a productive member of society.
He screamed for everyone to hide, unplugged the music, then talked to the cop. Last I saw he was high fiving him...
He's the fucking cop whisperer.
Only he would come to a strip club and talk about an internship with Walt Disney during a lap dance.
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
My tweets this weekend consisted of me telling every bar I went to that they were my favorite valentine. I've never felt like more of an alcoholic
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
You told me I got kicked out of the bar for lipping off to the bouncers... what shocked me the most was that I made it to the bar
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
Randomize