I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
Went to mcdonalds... Wishing I could throw up the last 20 hours of my life.
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
I hid drinks in her bathroom closet.... like a squirrel... a squirrel who knew she was going to get cut off soon
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
Went to work in the same clothes from last night, completely covered in glitter...I didn't choose the hag life, the hag life chose me
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
There's only two more days left to say you saw me naked this year.....I'll bring the booze, you got all of next year to rationalize why.
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
You know what i hate? I hate when the ppl you drunkenly made out with actually want to talk to you sober. It just doesn't work that way sir.
Randomize
