ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
She made me put my jeans under her mattress so that I wouldn't leave in the morning while she was still sleeping. Apparently I just look like "that guy".
do you know what's more awkward than a positive pregnancy in a public bathroom?
not a thing
walking in on a stranger's positive pregnancy test in a public bathroom
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
Power went out. She lit a candle and gave me head. Made some pretty impressive candlelight cocksucking shadowpuppets. Must be what porn was like in olden times.
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
Dude he took a shit in the lake and it just floated around and lingered near our boat for 2 hours. I fucking hate that kid
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
It's official we're now working from home permanently. I'm getting paid to have sex and sandwiches. I hit the lottery.
Randomize
