Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
Kareoke will never be a sober sport
this beer tastes like vomit already
Measuring your booze intake in glasses is like measuring Rosie O'Donnell's weight in ounces.
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
He puked in the voicemail. That's a true friend right there.
Considering the fact that everyone took the wrong jacket from that party, should we casually try to return the chalice and soccer ball we stole from last night?
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
What am I even going to do with 20 more jello shots? And don't say give them to the cat
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
I just talked comic books with a cop. We high-fived as he was running my name.
Proud of you.
We discussed the legality of being a vigilante. I won.
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
Randomize
