let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
I woke up with a solved rubics cube in my purse
You're breaking my vagina 4 times a day I reserve the right to know your middle name.
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
the bouncer watched the girl drop her ID, saw me pick it up and say OMG SHE LOOKS LIKE ME, and then let me use it to get into the bar
Hurry up and get here. I already announced to the bar that you were on a mission to get laid tonight. I have 3 takers.
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
My roommate said I banged on the wall and said, "this dude eats pussy like a champ."
Being sober is boring. Tomorrow I'm def bringing wine and my vibrator to work. Might even booty call that hot guy on floor 5. Making the last week at this job legendary.
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
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