Thank God for loud music. There is a circus in my butt right now.
Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
i just fucked the bartender on my cruise to get free alcohol. have things gone too far?
My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"
I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
He gave me his number and said the usual call whenever you need someone but then was like... or just call me.
You would pick up a guy in AA.
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
He told me I just kept sending him the word sex and dollar signs.
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
I walked into the bathroom of the hotel and she's in the bath tub with a guy she met a day ago. They were sharing a shrimp cocktail platter and shot gunning bud lights. Oh and it was noon.
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
I'm sobbing to NWA
I learned a valuable lesson about combining day drinking with malt liquor: you may think you have super powers, but that's just the Steel Reserve talking.
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