I'm gonna cuddle the shit out of you tomorrow
soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
Randomize
