belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
i just rode the bull and i see vomit in my future.
Upon hearing of his newfound access to every orifice... even ones he just made up... the Grinch's penis grew three sizes that day.
you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
smoking a cig and getting head on the last night of my cruise. and she doesn't mind that i'm texting you right now. this is now on my list of top 10 nights of my life.
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
the majority of my texts from you are at 3 AM & consist of either "I'm drunk", "you're asian", or "bratwurst"
tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder.
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
So I found where you barfed in my house. Just wanted to let you know that my cat barfed on the kitchen floor in a show of solidarity
I forgot that places existed where drinking on Sunday is frowned upon. It's just so unreasonable.
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
Randomize
