just got waxed at a place I havent been to in a while
woman didnt remember me then in the middle of waxing she announced that she just didnt recognize my face
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
I felt like a fire hydrant the vomit just kept coming out
dude i feel like at any given point 3/5 of that family is trying to fuck you
I don't want to talk about her cat for two hours only to dry hump till I'm blistered. Not worth it.
I really want to know why half of my kitchen floor is missing.
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
FOund a bunch of old fireworks spring cleaning.
Who is our new insurance provider?
I was so high the sounds of a cricket drove me out of my home at 4am.... Boo that fucking cricket
I though he and I knew each other well enough that we could go to my hotel room to do a bunch of cocaine together without their being any homoerotic implications, but NOOOOOOOOO!
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
And he claims I gave him “fuck me” eyes while he was ordering me a happy meal
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