WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
just threw the rents a curveball by making french toast and bacon when i came home sober. good luck tellin when im high/drunk now.
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
Do you think county jail has a Groupon?
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
Happiness is having a 12 hour day thinking that there are only 2 beers in the fridge when you get home, but then finding 8. Fuck you Monday, this week I won.
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
You slapped my ass and yelled "HOOTY TOOTY WHAT A BOOTY" in a Schwarzenegger voice
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
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