She's JV to your varsity
I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
hey, sorry about all the butter. I thought it was gonna help.
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
I think you'll be amused to know that I achieved the impossible feat of tripping over my own dick
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
The date went significantly better after the fifth shot of fireball.
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
I have an ideal penis or slightly above ideal penis in every country that isn't ruined by the specter of communism
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
Love waking up to a new contact named “Pizza” btw
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
Randomize
