he was wearing sponge bob boxers. Guess how long he lasted.
Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
You know you hit rock bottom when you make out with a guy named after a cereal.
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
Is it penis luge time yet?
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
this morning's inventory: a top hat, two empty bottles of everclear, half a slim jim, cigars, tiara, pot necklace, and some fishnets. and that's just my purse.
I'm not going out, it's sweat pants and gallon vodka night at my place and I'm the only one on the guest list.
This is because you lost at fooseball isn't it?
My boobs weigh the same amount as 25 pancakes
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
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