Standing here next to my mom talking to my friend trying to act like he doesn't sell me E every weekend.
the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
You need to come get me. I'm pretty sure that gravity's going to crush my brain
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
She has the best kind of daddy issues
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
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