walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
I realize it truly is impossible to burrow under the grass like a mole. Let's not drink for at least another 3 days.
When I see myself in tank tops and push up bras I seriously wonder why I'm not President.
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
I found a briefcase foll of fireworks in my old bedroom...that's an appropriate thing to bring to a wedding, right?
Look man if you're looking for a voice of reason, you're talking to the wrong woman.
I just traded a couple nudes for pizza delivery. Call me lazy, easy, or an entrepreneur, but either way I'll have dominoes in 15 minutes.
The morning after your company Xmas party and that moment you're eating a block of cheese in bed wearing a sequin blazer and recalling all the details of your one night stand with a coworker who happened to start that day...fuck.
My manager caught me going taking a nap in an empty room. Apparently she sleeps there too.
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