Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
i was just at lovers lane looking for gifts for a bachelorette party.....with my mom
I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
when someone at the bar asked you a question all you knew how to say was "chug-a-lug"
Found her with a stray dog now called champagne, crying about how she feels a mom now. Had to take her home. The dog too.
The extent of "getting it in" was this creepy guy sticking his finger in my bellybutton
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
I just spilled my beer on a five year old. She's crying but I can promise you I'm more upset.
You wear a dinosaur suit one time and everyone thinks you're a furry. Fucking hell, man.
Me and mom just bonded over our mutual desire to bang Mark Ruffalo. I'm not sure how to feel about this.
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
Married dude I had an affair with 10yrs ago was at table next to us at dinner last nite. My mom asked him to take a pic of us & then commented how cute he was as they left. Do I tell her he’s got a huge D too?
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
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