he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
Yeah but if I do that, I'd have to buy my own stomach pump for the house. That doesn't seem like a great thing to have sitting on the coffee table.
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
Can you get arrested or in trouble for punching a dead relative in a casket?
my bedside table was not meant to hold this many beer bottles.
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
promise me that when we are 32, we will look nothing like Kim Zolciak. Promise me right this instant.
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
We are a team. I lure them in with my tits, feed them enough alcohol to consider homosexuality, and hand them off to you.
You're the best wingman ever.
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
I'm gonna try Jim's breakup remedy this weekend.
Is that the one where you drink 3 cases of beer and rewatch as much WWE RAW as you can find? Or the one where you hookup with fatties on Craigslist?
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
Randomize
