I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
An eyelash just fell out into my container of rice. Searching for it, i took a single piece of rice out at a time coming to the coclusion that i should not be this high while eating rice.
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
His dick was as big as my arm. Giving him a handjob was like giving someone an Indian sunburn.
Whoever decided to wrap my shins in duck tape owes me new leg hair.
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
His phone pocket dialed me while he was crapping. He was quietly singing stayin alive and possibly passing his intestines.
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
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