And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
just went onto Yahoo and the featured article had a picture of one of the Jonas brothers. last two times the featured article was a celebrity's face the headline was "Michael Jackson is Dead" and "Pitchman Billy Mays is Dead" so naturally I got a little excited. Turns out he's just engaged. Who gives a fuck.
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
After we had sex, she played this little piggy with my toes
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
I woke up covered in blue paint and my knee bleeding, when I went to return the shopping cart the guy in the elevator laughed hysterically. I'm having a good morning.
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
Tell me you didn't have sex with my dad.
Burnt my ear trying to use the bathroom blow dryer as a telephone.
I need to stop getting so excited when a guy unzips his pants and its bigger than my boyfriends. I look like a kid in a candy store.
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
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