I'm eating all of the evidence.
playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
i just licked mashed potatoes off my blackberry. i'm not even ashamed to admit that to you.
did that guy on the oscars really just tell me to text a dolphin?
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
It is official. It's the year of doin married chicks. Similar to the year of virgins but without all the baggage.
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
Standing here wondering if its a good idea to cook pork chops in the toaster or not.
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
My girlfriend is talking to my ex-boyfriend at the bar right now. I REPEAT, GIRLFRIEND IS TALKING TO EX BOYFRIEND RIGHT NOW. GET ME THE FUCK OUT OF THIS PLAACE
So vagazzling was a success
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
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