We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
Someone asked me what I was drinking, I was drinking rum, but I was also eating starbursts so i told them "daiquiris"
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
Next Halloween I want us to dress up as jockeys, get drunk, and ride a carousel all night until we throw up or declare a winner
I'm 2 beers deep on an empty stomach, and I just wanna say, I pride myself on my use of commas
He must've been a bear in a previous life. My nipple is bleeding. Shit's sensitive.
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
Randomize
