Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
This morning on my way to work I saw a guy ride his bike straight into a woman and her dog while trying to light a bowl. Thought of you.
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
This girl I interned with got engaged today and I'm just like over here taking plan B with my tacos and PBR.
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
Im about to get an ultrasound of my balls. I hate waiting. Its the worst.
Randomize
