i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
We told the pizza man that the door was most likely unlocked, he could leave the pizza on the counter and give himself 20%. He did it-I'm never moving out of Aspen.
He just became a fan of Chelsea Handler on Facebook. WHY DO I ALWAYS PICK THE GAY ONE
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
I drunkenly called my ex on Skype last night and didn't talk, just smiled real big at him until I fell asleep.
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
I folded my dollar bills into mustaches in preparation for our trip to the strip club
What would you do if your asshole suddenly made the sound of a sheep duck baa/quacking the words kill me
You are so incredibly one of a kind, it's astounding
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
Just don't have sex while watching Home Alone. It will ruin Christmas for you.
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
I just licked honey off my own tit. Is there anything about that which doesn't SCREAM single???
Randomize
