Last-second stop at the drug store for lube and condoms. Clerk said "So uhmmm...that's a done deal, huh?"
High five!
I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
Turns out, his fucking is as lame and staggered as his NFL career.
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
At one point my little brother was Rocky Balboa'd by a stripper's tit
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
Wearing Navy dress whites to a wedding is like having a magical panty removing device. I've never cockblocked a whole room just by existing before.
Oh god he’s a clown I fucked a rodeo clown
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