North Korea, Best Korea!
Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
I've only been here for an hour and I've already made 6 babies cry.
Happy Birthday
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
3 things. 1. is this real life 2. my liver hates me 3. keg race tonight
Tough to be a good wingman when you puke on yourself and everyone w/in a 5 ft radius at the FIRST bar we go to so don't tell me to step my game up
We broke up in downtown Nashville with drunken, blow up penis waving bachelorette parties walking by. For some reason I can see this ending up as a country music video.
I'm sorry, when did "I like your shit" become an acceptable pickup line?
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
Wow just discovered I can communicate my favorite sex positions using only emojis god bless this age of technology
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
do you remember yelling out "insecurity makes my pussy dry!" unnecessarily loud at the bar?
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
Randomize
