elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
Okay I can't even be mad, I'm in mid-plot to hook up with Michael Phelp's third cousin.
So the dude who sold me my english book is the same guy who let me punch him in the face in exchange for a cig at a party a few weeks ago. small world huh ?
I just said "okay we have 20 minutes to get each other off, ready... Set... Go!" and he picked me up and threw me on the bed. I almost came just from that.
Worrying about "What smells like cat pee?" is so much easier than worrying about "What am I doing with my life?"
Would you like to get an apartment bong? It can be like our pet and we can give it a name.
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
Dude chill patience is a virtue.
WHY DOES PATIENCE HAVE TO BE A VIRTUE, WHY CAN'T HURRY THE FUCK UP BE A VIRTUE?
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
Randomize
