Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
i don't know what the guinness world record is for longest time eating nothing but skittles but i'm going on six days
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
You crawled through a doggy door 5 times for a shot if cheap vodka.
Why is your name written on my hand surrounded by hearts and a bartenders phone number?
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
I JUST HAD A FLASH MEMORY OF DOING A SHOT OF WHISKEY WITH MY BEER YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO PUNCH ME IN THE FACE TO PREVENT THAT FROM HAPPENING.
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
The only reason I know his name is because we wrote marriage vows in orange crayon on the back of a Walmart receipt.
I just remembered touching your bosses wife's fake tits last night. Thanks again for taking me to your work function.
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
Randomize