You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
There's trophy wives that arent even in the 5th grade yet
My professor just used "labia" and "numchucks" in the same sentence. I am dying.
i feel sorry for the hotel staff that makes the bed after we have sex
I was all over the place but at every locale you would pop out of nowhere and hand me a huge drink and say "HAMMERED"
I am the fairy godmother of the drink.
I'm so hungover it hurts to blink.. oh sweet merciful Christ what have I done
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
dude, i just found out morgan freeman loves weed. all my moms arguments are now irrelevant
I just watched your sister pour half a bottle of cotton candy flavored snow cone syrup into a bottle of marshmallow flavored vodka, take a swig, frown, and pour a cherry coke in.
Just wait until she offers you a "powerita"
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
Randomize
