First funeral I've ever been to where the cops had to come.
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.
SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
You were mean to me and you broke my heart and hurt my feelings. You dont get to talk to me about Peter Dinklage
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
ETSY JUST SENT ME AN EMAIL WITH THE SUBJECT "SUMER ROMANCE" I'M BEYOND FUCKING DONE
Bro, if we got a house, it'd basically be a revolving door for slightly overweight, but extra cute, sexually deviant girls with daddy issues.
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
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