I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
i'm in his bathroom *freshening up* and he not only has a hairdryer... but a straightener. get me out of here... NOW
I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
WTF?! TAYLOR SWIFT JUST WON ARTIST OF THE YEAR OVER MICHAEL JACKSON?! WHAT IS THIS WORLD COMING TO?!
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
Found my smoke alarm in a ziploc in my toilet...again
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
No, I'm not a weirdo, I keep bondage straps under my matress like a normal person, not a diary.
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