i told my grandma i broke up with my boyfriend. her reply " you need to play the field more anyway"
Nothing says I have a hang over like telling your boss to "eat your shit"
Ok, so for future reference, in Rome, "piano bar" means "brothel".
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
She barfed in the corner of the baby pool. Then she yelled "it's okay" repeatedly while trying to scoop it out.
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
I went eBay shopping last night. Turns out I brought a Viking drinking horn. I can't even be mad.
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
I wanna send them a card but I don't think hallmark makes a "sorry your fiance and another girl blew me at the same time in a frat house but congrats!" card
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
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