Just soaked up some whiskey with a paper towel and then squeezed it into a cup for consumption. New low.
She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
I can't believe I had to convince you to not drink butter.
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
I don't know what weirder, the fact that I flat out said "I thought I deleted you from facebook" or that she responded with "I just hacked your account and readded myself". Never thought I'd say this but I wish drunk me would stop making friends!
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
If you're ever desperate for a guy's #, ask him to call your lost cell phone so you can find it. Some genius used that on me last night. FML
Lying naked in bed eating carrot cake of off my bare breasts while watching Family Guy. Tonsilitis isn't all bad!
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
That's why we have robots to masturbate for us
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
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