I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
At lowes after workin outside. Kid behind me says "mommy that man smells like a taco" yes she was talking about me.
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
Do you think he stole that soccer trophy that he gave you for the "best sweater award" from his five year old son?
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
Yeah... I still gave her a hug because I felt really bad though. I mentioned that my boyfriends grandma just died too, just to reinforce that I'm straight afterwards.
"Wait, who's gun did I have?" Moments when you re-examine your life choices.
I passed out in all my clothes. like my purse too..and with a cup of water next to me..and my last tweet last night was "Bye."
You crowd surfed from beer pong into the bathroom where you spent the rest of the night, also I have your wallet
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
I cannot be with a girl who won't let me come home on my lunch break, eat spicy ranch and watch Breaking Bad without pants on. #lesbianproblems
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
Randomize
