The only thing I want to hear out of a girl's mouth tonight is, "slurp".
After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
I'm not entirely sure what happened last night, but I think I dislocated my kneecap during an epic Mario Kart battle...
You described pouring milk in your strawberry cereal as a glittering magnificent water fall, skimming over the mountain and little strawberry citizens.
I'm so excited for post-beer fest chipotle. It will be better than scared shitless pre-go karting chipotle.
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
I should've negotiated that before I sat on his face.
...i have a beer in one hand, and a chicken wing in the same. typical tuesday, right?
so this hot guy who looks like brad pitt circa troy era in my physics lab is staring at me right now and it's taking all the willpower I have not to procreate with him right now.
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