so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
I was just standing there and then BOOM! She was attacking my face with her mouth.
I don't get it, man. She treated me like a sexual predator but treated you like a piece of meat.
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
It's not a good night until someone eats a bagel covered in face mask thinking it's cream cheese
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
I think if I set up a series of baby gates up the stairs each one more difficult to undo then the last that should be able to stop your drunk vagina.
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
Why is your solution always to masturbate
Because it usually works
It made me want to take you home, put you in footie pajamas and feed you spaghettios
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
How did your walk of shame include a trip to Walmart and how did you bump into the cop that arrested you last night there?
Randomize
