wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
There's nothing like vomiting in the restroom at work to remind you that you're not in college anymore.
She said, "I don't really go out much, but my husband recently cheated on me" and I don't remember anything after that.
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
You stuck a chicken finger in that stripper's clevage and said "Keep this warm for me.
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
Getting knocked up by someone with a good job and a big dick, okay. I can handle that. Getting knocked up by someone who sells dildos for a living and has a tiny dick, SOMEBODY is losing a pair of balls.
Randomize
