let's put it this way: i'm gonna stop drinking and get a gym membership. she's that hot
I cant prove it..but im almost positive that you were just outside my window watching me while eating out of a bag of Cheetos...
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
My public calorie counter app is pretty much just a cry for help.
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
I had to have the guy I went out with last night come pick me up from the hotel the next morning after I ditched him for a firefighter..don't even talk to me about a walk of shame
My gynaecologist hit my g-spot today by accident and for some reason I went "at least someone found it" VERY AWKWARD
I think the blind guy i flirt with on a regular basis is starting to realize he's old enough to be my father. I can't tell if he's into it or not.
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
I really wanted you to make me eggs this afternoon. I even wrote it on my hand to remind myself.
Randomize