I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess
Dude I just figured out the mystery flavor of airhead is vodka sprite, no way i'm wrong
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
Oscar is the man. He keeps getting pictures of hot nude women with messages in spanish saying "i hope you like it" sent to his phone
whose oscar?
the baller who i guess decided to give out a fake number at the bar last weekend. luckily that fake number was mine. i have enough porn to last me until next month.
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
Whoa. I woke up to 10 new text messages. All about bacon.
you were asking all the dicks on chatroulette if they had daddy issues
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
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