We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
Matt just took me to visit my puke stain from 2 weeks ago at the train station...I'm fucking impressive
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
We're stealing the mannequin. He's my new swimming partner.
our flight took off 8 am and the bar didn't close til 5, so we decided it was a good idea to just stay out all night. Drunk logic is awesome. We were all scared we wouldn't get let onto the plane
Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"
I am in a hotel room with 10 people. John is in bed eating an industrial sized pan of mashed potatoes. I think a non insignificant number of people saw my nipples.
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
You ran out of his house yelling "I got the goods!" Then you pulled toilet paper rolls out from under your shirt.
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
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