Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
Oh just living the dream. And by living the dream I mean drinking franzia out of a martini glass and watching family matters. Also, drinking every time Carl Winslow has a mustache and Eddie wears MC Hammer pants
So I just bought underwear that says "I'm taken." Just know that when I cheat on my bf with you, that's what I'm wearing
Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.
I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred
Are you texting, crying and driving?
And missing part of my eyebrow. Correct that is the description one would give of me at the moment.
I just ordered $70 worth of pizza and I'm not even ashamed. Happy Valentine's Day to me.
I'm not in bed, I'm driving and puking at the same time.... first for everything
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
He pulled out a Plan B pill and handed it to me as I left like it was a party favor. God Bless America.
How did you get so drunk?
Alcohol.
Randomize
