I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
I may or may not vaguely recall punching you in the dick but it was a misunderstanding and I forgive you can we have make up sex?
Its like drunk me is Oprah except instead of a car everyone's award is seeing my boobs
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
On a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being “good” and 10 being “banging a student’s father”, how bad is it that I’m banging a student’s father?
Im not as flexible as I once was, but I still managed to get eaten out in the front seat of a hummer behind keddies.
Randomize
