The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
Sorry for talking about super scientific shit so much last night, I know it bugs you sometimes when I don't shut up.
What? You sat on the couch for a solid 2 hours staring at your fingerprints and the only word that came out of your mouth was "how"
Maybe your new years resolution should be not to fuck in Sears bathroom anymore.
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
I woke up in an empty bathtub with the wrong brother
He was trying to hotbox the banana suit. Of course we traded him for vodka.
We are planning a drunk snapchat treasure hunt for tomorrow, and the treasure is his penis, this is a game I'm not willing to loose.
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
Apparently she broke up w/ her bf like 3 weeks ago. She actually called me to be her bday hookup cause she's single now. Patience- the virtue that occasionally pays off.
Just please don't close your legs while I'm down there again. I don't want my death to be labeled as "Head crushed while giving an individual cunnilingus".
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
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