i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
the owner gave me a free bottle of vodka and a 12pack of red bull if i agreed to leave. my drunken antics are finally paying off.
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
Nurse helped me count all my sexual partners and still gave me her phone number. She shall be #73.
Mom brought home a 36 pack of Smirnoff and was all "ring any bells?" and then winked. I'm scared. What does she know?
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
Seriously, even though I keep it clean, I could douse it in bleach and set it on fire and still not be comfortable with you actually holding it. It's been in my VAGINA.
You came home And decided to make beer battered bacon... That's why there was smoke
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
Right in the middle of our simultaneous orgasms, he shouted "HAPPY NEW YEAR" ruining the intimacy
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