Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
I was going to call you an awful person for that. but then i realized we're both awful people.
Really* awful people.
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
Yeah I don't remember why I went to the hospital though but I just called and they have my wallet
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
Half the people who compete die. All the rest either lose their minds or grow an innate fear of sharks, vodka, and fishbowls
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
I woke up with my winter coat on, next to a polaroid of me, her and a swan...so no I don't remember our conversation.
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
Randomize
