I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
After we did it I noticed she was wearing the same underwear as last night.
That's why you don't sleep with the same girl two nights in a row man!
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
come to Starbucks. I'm the fat girl eating a whole pizza sitting on the ground
I feel like delivery guys should know that when you order lunch for one and answer the door wearing sweatpants, there's no need to say "Happy Valentine's Day."
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
I don't remember... but puking on the bar sounds like me.
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
if elf comes on TV one more time i swear to god i will smash my brains out with this fruitcake
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
Randomize
