So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
He came inside me, looked me in the eye and said, "Happy Mother's Day"
He just called me juicy booty via text message.
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
You were ¾ of the way through the first pitcher of margaritas then you turned to me and said "Wow I can barely taste the vodka!" And then…….
...Then...
Then I told you margaritas are made with tequila not vodka. You whipped the pitcher at the wall and ordered another one
That guy was cool until he tried fighting that dude in the bow tie. I need better wingmen.
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
Of course that's what I'm wearing. I need to find a beard to mount and ride STAT.
Her name was Danica but I felt like it would be hard to say drunk so I called her Shelby
Randomize
