no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
Are you missing anything? I found a wedding ring in my bed this morning.....
Haha I wonder if my burp offended him. So I gave him a fist pump to signify how friendly I am
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
When the cops came you just told them you'd go to your time out corner.
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
I was in a house full of lesbians and they were all staring at me. I felt like the last cresent roll on Thanksgiving.
If I don't at least start a parade that spirals into drunken riots then I'm calling it a fail of a birthday
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
You're going to replace me with a robot made of heating blankets and a vibrator?
Randomize
