dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
I'm not sober enough to be having a conversation about a rap she wrote in Spanish about public safety
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
I told him he was probably the first guy to get fucked while wearing Star Wars pyjamas.
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
I just explained my sex life to the "if you give a moose a muffin" book... Is that weird?
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
I didn't know where you were for like 15 minutes and then I went in the bathroom splashing water on the mirror and throwing hand towels around saying that you were "redecorating"
I found a used condom in my purse this morning. It was in there with a bunch of smushed french fries.
I asked him if we could have sex sometime and he sent me a three page long text about his feelings for me. that's the only possible situation I've ever run into where a "k" response would have been more appropriate.
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
Randomize